Abandoned

Illusive reality
Deceptive truths
Honest lies
Blissful miseries

False reflections
In those eyes
Fake affection
Phony smiles

Shattered myths
Destroyed fantasies
A gush of blood
Over frozen lives

Dazed, confused
Paralyzed by fate
Screaming in silence
Choking with hate

Broken. Wrecked. Scarred.
For life.

This is for my best friend. Take care sweetie. God bless you.

Thinking aloud...

So November’s here. Four months gone. Just like that. Six more to go. Sigh… has it really been that long? Or rather…just four months? Feels as if I’ve been on my own forever. Its fun, you know. Paying my rent myself, fixing my own meals, juggling studies…being responsible is something I’m not really used to! But I’m liking it. Sure I miss the pampering…but this is better in a way. This time, when I went back home, I was treated like an adult for once. As an equal. My decisions were respected. They listened to me. I felt so proud. I think it’s the first time I felt I’ve actually ‘grown up’. I’ve learnt to trust myself. Trust my decisions. I know if there’s someone I can rely on here, its just me.

But there’s something I fear. I hope that in this one year, I don’t change for the worse. I don’t become indifferent to others. I mean, it feels as if I’ve seen so much that nothing else can surprise me. I don’t want to be that way. I don’t want that ‘I couldn’t care less’ attitude. That’s not me. I want to break down and cry at times. And sometimes, I want to laugh out loud. I don’t want to lose my power to feel. To love. To care.

I really don’t know what the future holds for me. But whatever it may be…I know I’ll be able to handle it.